Posted in art, duck, experimental, fine dining, food photography, food review

I saw this on Reddit

“Deconstructed food taken too far”

To be fair, it does look absolutely disgusting. But what do YOU think!!

Hit me up in the comments below or Twitter.

Posted in food review, review, sweets

Siri: show me an ice cream flavour that can’t possibly work, can it?

The good folks over at Haagen Dazs have obviously got bored during lockdown and decided to take a leaf from Ben and Jerry’s book of “what ice cream flavour would I think of if I was massively high?”

Even before trying this tub of Honey and Peach with Rose you just know it’s going to be disgusting.

But is it?

Actually, no! It’s not disgusting at all!

I lie. It’s fucking horrendous and tastes like what I imagine lavender and the year 1933 would taste like if you’re stuck in an old folks home waiting for a slow, boring death from an irreversible neurodegenerative condition.

Tl;dr
Haagen Dazs Honey and Rosewater Hallucinogenic Experience ice cream is inedible.

But what do you think? Think I’m being all mean and should remember the halcyon days of 1933 and lavender with a bit more affection? Then hook me up in the comments or Spotify where my band is!

Posted in chinese, ethnic, experimental, fast food, fine dining, fish, food photography, food review, fungi, fusion, holiday food, japanese, oriental, taiwan, Uncategorized

Things I’ve Learned Stuffing Myself In Taiwan

14993559_10154045512027966_8809291375523534925_nStar anise ribs, chicken with chili, potato starch prawns, intestine, stinky tofu and chili, chicken with glutenous rice flour balls, green beans, stir fried squid. 

In Taiwan you will experience things you probably wouldn’t get a chance to in the West; over the past couple weeks I’ve had things like fish jaw, intestines, jellied pork blood, sea urchin and god knows whatever else. Continue reading “Things I’ve Learned Stuffing Myself In Taiwan”

Posted in fine dining, food review, salads, Uncategorized

M&S Lunch Takeaway Disaster

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I was down my local Marks & Spencers fancy supermarket where all the posh office workers go to buy their quinoia salads and asparagus and I was all like “I, too, would like to give the impression that I am posh and have more disposable income that I know what to do with”.

And so it came to pass that the first few minutes of my lunch hour were spent in a daze of confusion as a plethora of ethnic and exotic foods greeted me: honey glazed salmon, mustard infused balsamic dressed edamame, slow roasted ham hock and I was all like “shall I just get a cheese and onion pasty from Greggs?”. But then I walked past the salad section and for a very reasonable price of £2.30 saw a tiny tub of SPIRIT of SUMMER Rice, Aduki Bean, Mango & Coconut Salad and I was all like “uh that looks pretty pretentious and horrible. Let’s prove my simple prejudices correct by buying it” So I did!

On getting back to my professional day job’s IT desk I inspected the inside of the packet:

salad

It appears the ingredients have infected by camera phone and forced the orientation into portrait. Anyway, how does it taste?

Even before sampling a mouthful I know how it’s going to go down: there will be an annoying taste of raw red pepper and it will smack slightly of Uncle Ben’s Rice Pots.

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In addition, the rice is sticky – in an unwanted sexy way – and the pineapple sauce is really sweet. The Aduki beans could easily pass for rabbit poo and after eating half the tub I give up and toss the packet into the bin.

On the plus side…!

There is no plus side. Stick to Greggs and save yer money. While you’re at it, hook me up on Twitter.