Ever since we kept cats when I was a child have I wondered what cat food actually tastes like so it was with a steely determination that I headed down to my local grocery shop!
I think I might have freaked out the cashier cos when she said something about “lucky cat!” and I said “I don’t have a cat” her facial expression changed from cheeree-ee-ness to something that resembled 89% utter confusion and 11% pure terror.
Anyway, what’s inside the packet?
It appears we have a problem of some magnitude; it looks bad and it smells not good at all, but does it taste ‘as good as it looks?’
Yes, horrendously disgusting.
Now, to be fair I did try this stuff about 4 times because I wanted to identify its unique flavours so I can reasonably say it is one of the most horrible things I have ever eaten. It tastes of chicken, yes, but there is something so very very unpleasant about it I almost vomit; it has a very burnt-rubber undertone and the chicken is chewy and tough; it is slightly sulphorous and the jelly is slightly more palatable than the chicken bits in so far as it doesn’t provoke such a strong vomiting response.
So, can I turn this into something edible?
OK, I think I’m going to make a Chinese stir fry because they eat cats in China so maybe there’s a logical tie-in there. OK, chinese take-away it is!
I have an gherkin (fresh), some sugar snap peas, ginger garlic, soy sauce, cumin, Yeungs Concentrated Chinese Curry Mix, sweet chilli sauce and Felix As Good As It Looks Cat Food With Chicken In Jelly.
I first add the ginger, garlic and chilli into a pan for a couple of minutes to soften. I then add the vegetables, the cat food and the sauces and flash fry for another 90 seconds. At this point I was expecting the frying cat food to smell unbearable but interestingly it doesn’t give off any odour when cooking.
The final step is to serve up with some sticky rice I made last night:
So, how’s it taste?
1% edible. This is a very challenging dish to eat. There are nice enough flavours from the spices, vegetables and sauces but the cat food lends a weird flavour and horrid texture to the dish: I can still taste that sulphorous and burnt rubber and I feel a bit ill. The dish also makes my mouth produce an alarming amount of saliva so I end up drooling all over the place.
For the second time in this blog, I am defeated.
So, have you eaten cat food? You have? Are you mad? Right, so what shall I cook with next? Fire over to the facebook page and tell me!
OR / AND twitter